The Uses of Dead Wizards

Warning: this may be vaguely gruesome to people who prefer more “clean”, “heroic”, or just plaing child-friendly games. It isn’t really that extreme, though.

What do you do when you’ve killed a magic beast? Steal its organs of course! They are often either valuable, usable, or in the worst case, food! (probably… hopefully)

But what about a wizard? They can be as magical many a strange beast, if not more. What do you do when you have killed the Black Sorcerer of the Moaning Swamp? Butcher him and sell his organs of course! The Fire Wizard of Burning Destruction would pay a handsome reward for such useful bits of meat.

sketch1498060825554
“Don’t laugh at me, I’m a very powerful wizard!”

 

But what is the uses of wizard pieces then? Oh, let me tell you…

(Or here’s a Handy PDF, if you prefer that)

Wizard Parts

First off, roll 1d8 per wizard level, to determine what parts are available. On duplicates, either double the effect if applicable, or re-roll that die. The head and hands are always usable.

Roll

Part Uses
Head

You can either make a Living Skull, or use the brain and eyes.

Hand Used to make five Bone Bullets, a Hand Spiders or a Relic.

1

Heart Crystalized hearts make excellent storages for eldritch power.

2

Liver

Makes Panacea when crushed to paste with rosewater and Echinacea.
3

Gallbladder

This is where spite collects in the body. Makes a poison.

4

Kidneys Makes chewy kidney jerky, which is a regular antidote.
5 Stomach

Used to create Bags of Holding. Where did you think they came from?

6 Intestines

When dried and stuffed with hair you can make Magic Rope.

7 Spine

Can be used to create a magic sword or staff.

8 Spleen

Boiled down it is one of the primary ingredients of healing potions.

 

Rummage through a brain: If you crack open a wizard’s skull and study the swollen brain lined with eyes, you can learn one random spell they knew, of the highest level you can both cast.

Living Skull: You can keep the wizard’s head alive. It can speak, and even teach you spells (though not cast them itself). The heads are often somewhat subdued, but not necessarily without thoughts of escape.

Paired Scrying Eyes: Two linked eyes. When you take one it your mouth and close your own eyes, you can see what the other eye sees. It’s rumored that you can permanently implant one in your own eye socket to be able to see from two places.

Sight Potion: This boiled down eye allows the drinker to see magic and ghosts for 5 hours.

Bone Bullets: Used in Elven Guns. Fires in a blaze of eldritch sparks, leaving bright traces behind. Can potentially deal damage of an array of types, and in rather large quantities too.

Hand Spider:Two hands sewn together at the wrist. Can be used as pseudo-intelligent handcuffs or as some kind of skittering thief.
Not very fast, but high grip strength.

Relic Hand: An enshrined hand. When held it can replace any spell component (even expensive ones), but has an x-in-20 chance to turn to dust, where x is the level of the spell cast.

Mage Heart: This hardened heart can be crushed to grant the user enough energy to cast a spell, of the highest level that the both the owner of the heart and the creator of the item could cast. If this is a higher level spell than what the user can normally cast, roll on a horrible magic mishap table of your choice.

Panacea: Cures two of the user’s ailments when eaten, randomly chosen if more than two.

Wizard’s Gall: A mage’s spite is often strong. This oozing acidic syrup will deal 1d6 damage to a person imbibing it, and then a further 1 damage per round for 8 rounds. A successful save vs. poison halves initial damage and the number of rounds active. Can be used to poison a weapon, but will corrode it while applied.

Magic Rope: 9 meters (30 ft.) of rope made of guts. It will tie and release itself at the user’s command, and even return to the owner if called. And yes, you can whip it at a guy and tell it to choke him. It’s somewhat springy, but stable

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s